Spring is wonderful isn't it? The birds returning and busily preparing for the birth of the next generation. The new growth occurring on the trees, the ground. Even with the impending return of outdoor allergens for me, I still love this season.
I've always loved newness. New school supplies. (Who's with me there?? I don't know if I could name ONE person who isn't a sucker for new crayons.) New clothes. New paint. New babies. Ohmahgoodness I go crazy over new babies. Ask anyone who knows me well or has had a baby while knowing me. I think I once practically pushed a gal out of the way so I could see someone's new baby at church (sheesh Amy, settle down for crying out loud). When I say crazy, I mean CRAZY. I blame it on the smell. It drives me wacko apparently. Who can beat the smell of a new little human?
This spring is a little more exciting for me though than past years have been. Maybe it's because the allergens haven't really started yet, but I'm thinking it's more for this reason: I feel like I'm finally coming out of a funk from the last couple years.
The short recap of why I got funky (and not in an Uptown way)? I had a my 4th (and last) baby. Yes measures were taken to ensure this as best we can. I developed intestinal issues after baby was born that I just recently figured out were being caused by food allergies/sensitivities that I didn't have before kid #4 arrived. We acquired a lake property. We changed churches after being in one place for 12 years. Friendships were lost; not because of hard feelings, but because that's what happens when you leave a place you've been at for that long. It can't be avoided no matter how hard you try. And relationships at the new place take time to build. Lastly, I turned 40 in the midst of all this. So, besides battling the health issues that kept me at home in pain most of the time, I also felt like I didn't have any friends or anyone that cared what was going on in my life or that I was contributing anything to the world besides clean laundry for 6 and chauffeuring kids around to activities. And I was barely able to do those! Basically, I was a mid-life crisis in the midst of depression-ville for a good year and a half.
But I've recently gotten a better understanding of the food/skin/intestine issues and am learning to manage what I need to do to stay healthy. Being gluten, dairy, and soy free makes eating out an interesting endeavor and I have bad days here and there because something is mysteriously in a food I ate. The lake property is getting easier to manage with everything that goes into making it enjoyable year-round for us and for short-term renters. The new church is starting to bring forth relationships. The baby is turning 4 in May. Things are getting easier. Finally. The gray is giving way to sun.
New opportunities are also starting to spring up before me. New ways of looking at how I use my gifts and talents. New ideas of what I can do to use these gifts besides coordinating laundry and chauffeuring. Which is good, because I did NOT dream of becoming a Martha Stewart or Betty Crocker sort of mom when I was younger. A mom who only attended to the affairs of her own household. I had dreams and ambitions I tell ya!
I'm not sure where these opportunities are going to lead me, but I do know it is nice to have most of the recent storm behind me. It is nice to have the sun shining on my face again. With these new opportunities comes the need for discernment and wisdom. I will need to rely on God so I don't overload my plate and do myself in. I am so thankful though that He is once again placing bigger dreams on my heart and visions in my eyes. After a time of wondering if I would be able to even leave the house for an afternoon of errands, this is a huge blessing!
Where are you right now? In the midst of a funk and dreading each new day or happily maintaining the day-to-day chaos? Facing new dreams or stuck in depression-ville? Battling health issues or starting over in a new place and you feel alone? Cry out to God today. He loves you and is for you! Reach out to those who have expressed care to you. I know that God is faithful and will bring someone to you to help you. And I know that He is ALWAYS there for you. And He is FOR you!
Blessings,
