Would've Beens

I am thinking about some people this week who are mourning a family member lost in '02.  Maybe they are saying things like "He would have been this old; he would have been married by now; he maybe would have been a father by now."

Most of us have someone who we remember, either at the anniversary of their death or when their birthday rolls around, that we go through the Would've Beens with.  I have some grandparents and a father.  My mom has parents and a husband.  My cousins have a brother.  My in-laws have a son. 

Maybe you don't have someone to think about yet; you will someday.  Did you know that 100% of people on earth die?   :)

But what about ourselves?  Do we ever go through the Would've Beens with ourselves?  Like, I would've been 20 lbs lighter by now if I'd have started that weight loss program last year.  Or, the basement would've been done by now if we weren't so busy.  Or better yet, my kids would've been healthier by now if I had been more consistent with exercise and cooking healthy meals this last year.

The Would've Beens are good for reminiscing about those we've lost - it's our way to remember them and keep their memory alive.  But on the other hand, maybe the would've beens wouldn't have been because we don't know where their life path would have gone if they were still alive.   We don't know and we won't ever know because it wasn't part of God's plan.

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The difference between them and us is we ARE still here...we CAN still make a difference in what would have been, in what could be.  Because if we're still here, that means God has something for us to do. 

But sometimes we get stuck so much in the past and weighed down so much by our guilt of what could have been if we'd just done this or that, we can't get moving in the right direction. 

Instead, we need to focus on what COULD be, on where we can start TODAY to start on the path of where we'd like to go, of where we feel God pulling us.  Taking baby steps towards the goals and plans we make and adjusting along the way as God shows us His will.

Then, a year from now, or maybe two or three, our Would've Beens have become our realities instead of our missed opportunities. 

With God's strength, guidance, and grace we can make it happen!